Thursday, October 13, 2005

Kingdom of Heaven on DVD?

Not sure what annoys me more about this movie:

1. Orlando Bloom.
2. Balian of Ibelin as a blacksmith.
3. Balian of Ibelin as a politically correct bonehead who wouldn't have been trusted with a blacksmith's hammer, let alone a sword, if he had talked the ludicrous piffle he does in this movie.
4. Ridley Scott's gorgeous cinematography, which I'd like to see if not for points 1-3.

This wretched movie is what is causing me to consider changing my SCA name. I thought I was completely safe choosing to admire such an obscure but interesting and admirable medieval figure by using his name, but no, 25 years later Hollywood has rubbished him like they do everything.

Popular culture is a vile thing. Don't buy this crummy film.


Anonymous said...

I will have to differ slightly here. If this was just a fictional story it would be ok. The history they play with and screw up are what I think hurts the film. That and Orlando Bloom can be annoying. Needless to say Balian, do not slam Orlando too much when in company of some ladies. That is the main reason he was cast. I think.
He was actually a better Paris in "Troy".

The extras to this film which include some history lessons are very good.

Keep in mind that I had not ever heard of the historical person till I came to Stormvale.

Its ok but you can save your money and buy Batman this week or better yet Age Of Empires 3 comes out thursday.

Mike E.

The Cat Bastet said...


I think you should keep your SCA name. You had it first and you know far more about Balian de Ibelin than Hollywood. Use this as an opportunity to educate people about the real Balian de Ibelin. Don't worry, it won't take long. If it's like the Robin Hood craze it will be over soon.

And remember, Orlando can't help it if the director doesn't know anything about history. He was obviously cast because he's gorgeous and a hot box office ticket.